Online dating is interesting. I signed up for OKCupid back in May, and, as my blog posts indicate, I’ve been on a number of dates with girls I’ve met on the site. Thing is, my blog posts may give an accurate depiction of my dates, but it doesn’t touch on how much effort is needed to actually secure the dates I’ve talked about. With that in mind, I’ve decided to pull some numbers and break down the math of my online dating for you.
Since I signed up for OKCupid in May of 2017, that means I’ve been online for roughly 5 months. In that 5 months, I’ve send a message to 116 different woman and which started 54 conversation of various lengths (most were short). Those 54 that I spoke with led to 10 first dates.
In addition to the above, I’ve been received the first message from 12 women. Of those 12, I was only actually interested in 2. The remaining 10 did not fit my ideal personality, look, or profile requirements. Of the two I was interested in, I went on a date with 1 of them.
Delving further into the 54 conversation I had, a majority of them ‘ghosted’ me. Most of the time I believe I was ghosted because I didn’t ask them out soon enough. There are some women that like to have a lengthy text conversation before meeting, but I’ve found a majority of them would prefer to schedule a date within the first 10 messaged. In fact, most of those 11 dates (10 + the one who messaged me first) happened after I learn this lesson. But others no doubt ghosted because I wasn’t their cup of tea. That’s okay. I moved on.
Of course, I’ll admit, I have ghosted a bit in my time. Usually I’d get tired of having to constantly ask a question in each message. If a girl can’t create conversation based on the context of my message, I figure she’s not worth my time and move on.
Averaging about 2 dates a month is not bad at all. In fact, most guys online are lucky to even get 1 date in that time. The supply and demand is intense and I’m privileged enough to be (somewhat) attractive and have my life mostly figured out. I think one of my next posts will be about the lessons I’ve learn while online dating that have helped me better secure a date, so keep posted for more. That said, if you have any tips, feel free to leave a comment and I may include it in my next post.