Blog, Dating, Life

Yup, She’s a Pole Dancer

I’ve often heard stories about women walking into a man’s apartment and being surprised or disgusted by what they find. Be it just an extremely dirty apartment, a computer with lotion and a trashcan full of tissue next to it, or, you know, 50 Shades of Grey shit. I’ve been dating a long time and can’t say I’ve never really been shocked by what I’ve seen in a woman’s place. They’ve always tidied up beforehand and even if they’re into something kinky, it’s stored away somewhere.

But, all things come to an end, and this is no exception. I was invited over to a woman’s place last week and was taken aback moments after stepping through the door. She had a pole. Dead centre in what would usually be the living room of her apartment. Let me clarify for those with questions: Yes, it was the same type of pole a stripper would use. It was affixed to the floor and ceiling by means of tension and it apparently cost her around $500 (these were my first questions).

This was a 4th date, so we had talked a lot and I already knew that she had a few interesting hobbies (painting, aerial silks, and yes, pole fitness) but that was not enough to prepare me for the shock of a giant pole in the middle of the room. Apparently pole fitness was her way of staying in shape and, as she was no longer a struggling student, she felt she could  spend a bit of money on her hobby.

I checked out the pole as, I feel, any guy would. Which is to say, I pretended I knew about hardware and construction and checked to see if it was level and sturdy. I hiked up my jeans and said ‘Yup, that’s a mighty fine pole’ then turned to her and smiled. My mind immediately went to wanting her to give me a demonstration, but I’ve long since learnt to control such thoughts and withheld comment before returning to our previous conversation.

Later we talked more about the hobby and she then showed me a video of her recent performance with a friend. It was pretty impressive, but I’ll admit to being a little disappointed. You see, I’ve never been to a strip club. Although I’m sure I’ve seen a few pole dancers in movies, I’ve never really focus on it. Turns out, I don’t find pole dancing sexy. It’s impressive, and requires specific physical skills I’ll never posses, but it’s also not overtly sexy to me. Flexibility is sexy, sure, but the pole doesn’t add much to it.

I think the point of this story, if there is one, is that thoughts and opinions change throughout your life. I grew up in a world that instilled upon me that pole dancing was a sexual act. It was something strippers did and it was naughty. I was shocked when I first saw the pole but, after some serious thought on the matter, I realized that it was just a pole and a means for her to stay active. I’m much more attracted to the fact she has the confidence and strength to pole dance than the actual act itself, and that’s okay.

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