Monday’s date? Sushi. That’s right folks, a good old fashioned dinner date. I’m not the biggest fan of dinner dates, mostly due to the expense, but they have a place in the dating world – like when schedules are busy and you need meet sometime after work. Coffee dates are much better in my opinion, but you have to go with the type of dates the woman is interested in.
She is a doctor, which is something of a redflag. In past experiences, doctors tend to be a little interesting (strange) and a lot focused. They think of the world through their own lens, much like other professions think of the world in their certain way. The different being that doctors have to go through intense schooling and therefore they are some of the more driven people I know. Meanwhile, I’m a pretty relaxed individual.
So why would I even consider dating a doctor? Sometimes opposites attract. Sometimes people are looking for someone who can make them stop and smell the roses. I, as an example, enjoy being with someone who is driven and can push me to be a better person. Hopefully they bring that in the table and are looking for me to help slow them down in turn.
Anyway, back to the sushi date. I know a decent sushi place near the Toronto harbour front, so when she implied wanting to go to dinner, I suggested it. As a guy, you usually need to do the suggesting. The restaurant has good food and allows for the opportunity to extend the date into a waterfront walk after.
In order to impress a driven doctor, I thought it would look good for me to call and make reservations. Not only that, but this sushi place has exactly 1 window seat, which you can reserve. I did, ’cause I’m a classy motherfucker.
I arrived early and patiently waited for her to arrive almost exactly on time. She was pretty and well dressed – both pluses in my book, for obvious reasons. After a quick hello hug, we enter the restaurant. As soon as we sat down, I felt as if I was meeting someone regarding business. How she asked about my day didn’t feel very genuine. Likely because she was nervous and had a few questions planned ahead of time. No problem, it’s time for me to take the lead in order to make her feel more comfortable. I make the conversation flow more naturally, asking her questions based on the conversation, rather than cookie-cutter questions. I make jokes, I ask about points she made while talking. After being on as many dates as I have, you get a feel for this kind of things and it flows more naturally which relaxes your date.
Turns out, she is musically inclined. From her profile and messaging, I knew music was a part of her life, she even turned me onto a new band called Thirdstory (which is amazing, by the way) but, as is a common problem when chatting online, I didn’t realize how much she was into music until talking in person. She apparently helped with some school musicals and does some cover music on the side. I love music and musicals, so I’m interested.
Somehow that conversation transitions into talking about family and I find out she used to play an old game I loved called Diablo 2. This nice, but mediocre date, is turning for the better. We talk more about some of my geeky interests. I feel like she’s trying to understand just what type of geek I am, and I answer all her questions unabashedly. No reason to hide who you are on a date. You might spent the rest of your life with them, it’s best to start on the right foot.
Before we know it, the sushi boat we split is done and it’s been 2 hours of us talking and eating. The bill comes and as I try to pay, but she says we should split it. At this point, I’ve paid for enough failed dates to never turn down the offer for her to pay if she insist, so we split and she doesn’t seem upset (sometimes they do – dating is hard).
After that, it’s slightly awkward. Do we end the date? Do we keep talking? Go for a walk? I’m interested, but not a lot. So I suggest we walk down the waterfront and chat. Talking goes so well that I end up walking her home (adding another hour to the date). We talk about all kinds of things and I ensure to hold nothing back in terms of my interests and the kind of guy I am. She’s laughing (as am I) and it seems to be flowing a lot more. I even ask a few specific questions that will help me think of good second date activities.
Eventually, we get to where I’m dropping her off and after a bit of banter, we hug, say we had fun and would like to do it again, and say goodbye. Overall, it was a good date. I didn’t feel any amazing spark, but I did enjoy myself, so I decide I’m going to ask her out again.
The next day I send her a fun text about some podcast I was listening to. We text back and forth a bit, and I ask her if she’s like to go on another date. Her response: This and next week is on the busier side for her, rain check for the week after? Which, for all you dating novices, means I’ll likely not hear from her again. But hey, I got a fun night out and it didn’t break the bank. On to the next one.